On Monday I had a check in call with a client who’s doing my Custom Fit Programme.
She asked a good question…”what do I do in situations when a friend or someone I’ve just met offers me something I’m trying not to eat?”.
It’s a great question and it highlights the power of your language in these situations. Check out this real life anecdote:
My mum is the driving force behind my work and passion for helping people with Chronic Illnesses and disabilities. She smoked 20-40 cigarettes a day, and had MS.
Hopefully you know that smoking is a bad idea if you have MS?
Well, when I was 8 or 9 she decided to quit. One of her strategies was to put a massive “no smoking” sign on our front door. lol.
Another was more about her behaviour and language.
She told me that in situations where someone offered her a cigarette, if her response was “I’m trying to quit” it opens up the opportunity for the other person to say “Oh go on. One more won’t hurt you” and it leaves her vulnerable to the idea that she’s “trying” but hasn’t actually quit yet.
Her strategy was to be blunt and say ‘I don’t smoke” because that’s a more definitive response and it’s less likely to invite the other person to continue to offer.
The same goes for alcohol, food and any change you’re trying to make to your life.
If someone says “No thanks, I don’t eat meat” it’s unlikely you’ll try and convince them to change their mind.
If you’re cutting out crap food from your diet, saying “I’m trying to be good” or “I’m trying to cut carbs” isn’t as powerful as simply saying “I don’t eat that”.
Not only does it stop the other person from pressuring you, it also reinforces those words in your mind.
It also works the other around. “I’m going to the gym tonight” is way more powerful than “I should go to the gym tonight” or “I’m supposed to be going to the gym tonight”.
Try this technique out. It takes practice, but stick with it and you’ll see the difference it makes.